Pocket Junk and the Funky Kazoo

I’ve come to call the denizens of my pockets “pocket junk”.  Loose change, keys, wallet, cards that I just shoved back into my pocket, ticket stubs, phone, and the new arrival, my inhaler or “funky kazoo”.
The first portion of the list is normal.  Some of these things predate pockets.  Money has been carried around by people since it supplanted the barter system.  Keys as long as there have been locks.  These are so old that they hung from our belts before we made pockets.  And we’ve been carrying phones since we figured out how to get them off of the wall.
The inhaler?  Not so common.
I’d been experiencing chest pains daily for a while.  My doctor ruled out heart disease first.  This was a major relief as heart attacks are prominent in my family history.  We soon narrowed things down to either a “reactive airway”, or anxiety.  The only way to narrow it down is to try the inhaler for a couple of weeks.  If it works, my funky kazoo gets a permanent place among my pocket junk.  If not, we treat me for anxiety.  Fun.

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